My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
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Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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