Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
