my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
