He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
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