Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?