The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.