Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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