she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
