She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I currently don't understand fingers.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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