S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
