why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Randomize