Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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