I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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