Texts From Last Night

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  (540): View more from Virginia

  she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love

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  (540): she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love http://tfl.nu/im7c
  Replies (9) Good night (1391) Bad night (422) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs

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  (440): im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs http://tfl.nu/wg4t
  Replies (7) Good night (689) Bad night (2257) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  She looked kinda like Mario Batali?

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  (250): She looked kinda like Mario Batali? http://tfl.nu/17rh
  Replies (23) Good night (424) Bad night (2724) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"

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  (925): He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest" http://tfl.nu/ei63
  Replies (12) Good night (3731) Bad night (470) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.

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  (530): I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store. http://tfl.nu/ogm6
  Replies (18) Good night (1198) Bad night (3948) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.

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  (732): He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it. http://tfl.nu/hjdx
  Replies (79) Good night (9075) Bad night (2694) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"

  (905): View more from Ontario

  And sadly I did.

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  (905): They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?" (905): And sadly I did. http://tfl.nu/9e0f
  Replies (25) Good night (1967) Bad night (3950)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen

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  (201): there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen http://tfl.nu/0xt9
  Replies (17) Good night (5474) Bad night (833) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?

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  (781): Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink? http://tfl.nu/6hyx
  Replies (6) Good night (2095) Bad night (556) Order T-Shirt
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.

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  (334): I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call. http://tfl.nu/huax
  Replies (3) Good night (991) Bad night (1920) Order T-Shirt
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart

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  (509): Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart http://tfl.nu/gb8n
  Replies (6) Good night (1476) Bad night (1072) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms

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  (+61): he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms http://tfl.nu/3nr0
  Replies (14) Good night (1623) Bad night (516) Order T-Shirt
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"

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  (724): oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis" http://tfl.nu/2s94
  Replies (10) Good night (1105) Bad night (325) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger

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  (+61): The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger http://tfl.nu/x8sq
  Replies (4) Good night (437) Bad night (974) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.

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  (517): Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now. http://tfl.nu/rvro
  Replies (4) Good night (332) Bad night (730) Order T-Shirt

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