so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
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You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
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I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
A+ Viking dick