Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
