I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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