he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
