I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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