So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
