one two three fourrrrnication!
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.