HIV tests are more positive than that guy
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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