doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
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You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
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I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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