Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
