'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize