Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?

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(559): View more from California

She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.

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(917): View more from New York City

I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(978): View more from Massachusetts

I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety

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(217): View more from Illinois

I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'

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(404): View more from Georgia

I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing

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(847): View more from Illinois

Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!

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