So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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