We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Randomize
