pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
