she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
He did a backflip because drugs
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