Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
