well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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