i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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