that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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