Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.