She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Randomize
