and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize