Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize