too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize