i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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