just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
