all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
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No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
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We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize