pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
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I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
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Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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