look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
