you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
