I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with