I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
