worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
