You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Randomize
