If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
My ATM looks so different sober.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
