I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Randomize
