he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
